Full-body and targeted workouts incorporating muscular endurance, cardiovascular work, stretching, and some boxing fundamentals (depending on interest). In short: total conditioning for all your earthly shenanigans. No drill sergeants, no boot-camp fanaticism, just a comprehensive outdoor session at your desired level of intensity… until you drop like a fly from the wall.
Group Drop-out classes: ANU ovals, UC ovals, John Knight Park (Lake Ginninderra). We may also take excursions from our little discomfort zone to run a circuit or mountain trail. Flexible days and times (majority preference). Group classes are strictly limited to 300 people. Only the original 12 are to be known as the Dirty Dozen. $10 per session. As you’d expect, the first class is free.
Group training sessions presently underway (as at 22/05/2013):
Wednesday 7:15am (ANU)
Saturday 2:30pm (ANU)
Contact: falloverfitness(at)gmail(dot)com.
Personal Flailing: Flexible days, times, and locations. I’ll cycle to any suitable outdoor location (parks, ovals, trails, nature reserves, etc) within a 3.14159 mile radius of Belconnen’s epicenter as defined by the google gods. Every mile after that deserves a banana. We’ll design your personalized training regimen and get on with it. Drop me a telegram, carrier pigeon, or e-mail. $40 per hour. No celebrities.
Contact: falloverfitness(at)gmail(dot)com.
Attendance is by invitation only. Write me with a brief summary of your athletic background, present activity level and fitness goals, preferred training times and locations, a minimum of three professional and/or academic references, a recent psychoanalyst’s report, and a police background check.
Frequently Anticipated Questions:
Q: Where exactly do we meet?
A: Just follow someone at random and you’re likely to find us. Or you can RSVP and I’ll reply with the actual location.
Q: What should I bring?
A: ‘A towel… is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have.’ – Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. And water.
Q: What’s the damage again?
A: Group classes are $10 or whatever you think is fair, whichever is the greater. Personal training prices are calculated against a thorough income assessment, means test and tax audit, by which we will arrive at more or less exactly $40 per hour. Students under 65 years receive a $5/hr student discount, and are subject to a $5/hr student surcharge.
Q: Who is this upstart anyway?
A: Late 20′s, male, background in hopscotch, jump-rope and marbles. You can dig my escapades elsewhere on this site.
Q: Are you even qualified?
A: Is a tiger qualified to pounce, an eagle to soar, a leaf-cutter ant to gnaw through a flake of chlorophyll and walk vertically up and down his tree?
Q: No but seriously, why should I let you train me?
A: My athletic portfolio (present to past) includes: regular, intensive distance running (especially trail and mountain running), commuting ‘most everywhere by bicycle (and not some slick road bike either, but a heavy mountain dog), 5 summers of commercial, high-volume whitewater rafting (one of the most physically intensive jobs out there), kayaking on the side, a black belt in traditional jujitsu, a decade of weight training, and a two-year stint in the Australian Army Reserve (infantry).
If you’re into bits of paper: Wilderness & Remote First Aid (valid to June 11, 2015), Swiftwater Rescue Technician (valid to June 16, 2015) – in case you fall into Sullivan’s Creek.
I also have a coaching certificate from the Australian Institute of Sport (this sounds fancy but was completed entirely online – don’t be fooled by papers of pomp and pedigree).
Q: What makes your gig unique?
A: Oh nothing. Just my top secret Fitness Filosophy and Training Principles.
Contact: falloverfitness(at)gmail(dot com)
Fallover Fitness
Don’t be Stood Up
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